Rivalry: Your One-stop Shop For The Best Casino Games In India – My 4 and 8 year olds are closer now than they were before the flu – I can hear the sounds of their laughter coming from their bedroom at night. But the more time my daughters spend together, the more they fight.
For my children, the usual battlefields were seen as injustices and status struggles. The most recent example was last fall when we were waiting to receive medical keys. The girls fought over who got shot first. My first daughter «won» that battle, but when she walked in the doctor’s door, she realized the bullet wasn’t really a gift.
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We were locked in the house together and they cried at operatic levels, fearing that their father and I had done something very bad as parents to encourage so much strife. But according to University of New Jersey psychology professor Jeanine Vivona, sibling rivalry is a fact of life. And we, as people with siblings and people with children, we try to manage as much as we can. we can.»
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Observational studies have shown that siblings can fight eight times an hour. Other studies have shown that sisters are the closest people, and siblings have the most conflict. «There is less conflict among young people; this stage, says Mark Ethan Feinberg, research professor of health and human development at Pennsylvania State University. «Infancy and middle school are critical periods for sibling aggression.»
According to Feinberg’s study of narratives, the book of Genesis, which contains the «Shaping Stories of the Western Psyche,» is filled with stories of murderous siblings and brothers, such as Cain and Abel, Jacob and Esau. And these stories are «topics that researchers are exploring today: violence, conflicts over parental love and resources, and triangulation of children in parental conflict.»
Sibling competition was even stronger hundreds of years ago when child mortality was high, especially among children with siblings under the age of 5. Sarah Walters, professor of demography at the London School of Hygiene and Tropical Medicine, said: «These deaths may be linked to an increase in childhood cancers in those families, as well as lower levels of maternal nutrition and general competition for parental attention.» and lead author of a study on Tropical Medicine and the Broth and Death Association in 19th-Century Belgium. This practice makes my kids fight over who gets the most ice cream.
Although most siblings don’t fight over real trash, psychologically, sibling rivalry has a developmental purpose: it helps kids think about what’s unique and special about themselves, or otherwise known as «unification.» Children want to appear the most special to their parents, so «they continue to take care of their siblings,» Vivona said. But they can model their interests and personalities based on the skills and interests of their siblings.
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For example, let the first child be a football star. A young child or children may avoid soccer because they’re afraid they’re not good enough or because they’re afraid of getting better — and they don’t want to take that risk, says Vivona. Or both get into the football team, but the older one is the main player, and the younger one tries to establish himself as a member of the team.
Since sibling conflict is expected, there is no way to minimize it. Here are five expert tips for handling sibling conflicts.
Think about what sets them apart. «Before the fight starts, think about what might happen,» says Sally Beville Hunter, a child and family therapist at the University of Tennessee in Knoxville. If your kids fight every time they play video games, for example, hold your ear when they sit down to play. Listen to the words or tone of voice they use during a fight and try to intervene before it escalates.
Help them learn to deal with conflict. Once the anger has subsided, sit your kids down and try to discuss the issue «without spinning or blaming,» says Feinberg. Allow each child to talk without being dismissed and try to solve the problem on their own. By the time children are in elementary school, they can «assess which of those decisions are rational decisions and which will work and be mutually satisfying over time,» she said. When solutions do not work, they must learn to reframe problems.
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Praise them in public and punish them in private. If your kids like each other, «praise loudly everywhere,» says Hunter. For example, «I want you to let your sister go first!» But if you do criticize them, try to do it out of earshot of the other child, as he may use it as a weapon. Our oldest daughter takes every opportunity to lead her sister on («Remember, Mom said you can’t jump from a sit-up!»), so I took this advice to heart. .
Try to find opportunities to combine everything. Your children may or may not have similar personalities and personalities. Maybe they both like to dance, or maybe one likes to dance and the other likes to play chess. Some may be strict and some may be free spirits. «Try to find tasks that everyone can easily do and that you feel connected to,» says Vivona.
I brought up family movie night as a family activity that we always do as a group, but I told Vivona that it would take too long to decide on a movie because of all the arguments. «Just because it lasts doesn’t negate its value,» he said. «You see the competition – nothing short.» But in the end, we’re all sitting down, taking care of each other, eating popcorn, and our kids are learning valuable skills like arguing, even if we’re watching Toy Story season 15.
Special Covid document. «We spend more time at home with each other, especially in the winter,» Hunter said. «I think some of these conflicts can be resolved by telling our kids to go outside and run around the house.» They can get jittery when tied up, so throwing some physical activity into the mix — even if it’s an indoor obstacle course made from sleeping pillows — can change the mood. for your account, but it may take a few minutes to appear in your inbox. Wait at least 10 minutes before trying again.
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If you have more than one child, you’ve definitely faced sibling rivalry. Arguing, name-calling, fighting, physical fights, competing and comparing, taking other people’s things, etc.
For parents, sibling rivalry can be difficult, stressful, and frustrating. Many parents dream that their children will be loving, kind and supportive.
Before proceeding, we recommend that you download the FREE Personal and Family Values. This publication will allow your family to research and find resources to help you make the right choices for you and your children.
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Sibling rivalry is normal and inevitable. It’s important to note that while you may be able to reduce conflict, you won’t eliminate it entirely.
Siblings fight because of jealousy, competition, conflict of interests and relationships, sometimes boredom or the way they communicate with each other or to get attention from you.
Believe it or not, sibling rivalry has some benefits. It teaches children how to manage power struggles, argue, manage and resolve conflicts, establish boundaries and stability, and more. helps to learn.
The result does not stop the sibling rivalry. The goal is to use conflict as a learning opportunity, maximizing the benefits of sibling rivalry.
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In addition, regulations, planning and construction activities can be established to reduce unnecessary and unnecessary health wars.
As you work with your children, create and establish clear family rules that will help reduce conflict. Rules for sibling rivalry include hitting, using words to solve problems, asking before doing things for others, calling each other names (not adjectives), etc. may include
Also respect, kindness,
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